A Brief Note About Happiness and Contentment
A friend once asked me something.
We were both 27. She had a successful career both as an auditor then accountant, had a side job as a photographer for an independent magazine, maybe not yet lucky in her relationship, but pretty much she had a good life and future in front of her. Nevertheless, she told me that she wasn’t feeling happy with her life. It wasn’t happy in terms of money, possessions or achievements, but like me, she always had this feeling of not knowing what she really wanted in her life. She didn’t know what her life purpose was.
I told her that maybe some people are destined to always searching our true happiness. Or maybe there is no such thing as happiness. Another friend of mine said that happiness is an illusion, a label. Later in life, I learnt that it is the feeling of content that we should always striving for, that it is alright to have what we have and also alright not to have what we don’t have. There’s an element of upward comparison — comparing yourself to other people whom by your standard, seem better or more successful — that needs to be eliminated if you want to feel content. Instead, it’s probably the opposite that you should do: comparing yourself to people who might not be as lucky as you are in some ways. But no, I’m not talking about pity, and this is not merely “luck” financially. You’d be surprised that there are people who are struggling to find ends meet but managed to keep a smile on their face, people who can keep being grateful despite whatever hardship they’re going through, or people who, doesn’t matter how many times they’ve failed on their dreams, they keep on going. You may argue that those people suppress their pain and suffering inside. You can argue that it’s not mentally healthy, that it’s actually sad, so on and so forth. Those may be true, but do you realise something?those struggles give them life purpose — and some serious thinking other than overthinking about what happiness truly is. Slow down and find these kind of people. Appreciate them, lift their spirit or help them if you could, instead of pity. Slowly you’ll forget what makes you unhappy. Your life isn’t always about you, you know.
Among other things, being content involves letting go the people who were once close to you but now not so much, and letting go the things that you thought were important for you but they actually don’t. I’ve known for a long time that the only person you should satisfy in your life is yourself and nobody else, so you should be able to do this. Feeling content should be under your control.
